Introduction: “It’s All in Your Head!”
How many times have you heard your mom say, “You’re not depressed, you’re just lazy”? Or your dad casually suggest that you “go and pray” instead of seeing a therapist? If you’re Nigerian, chances are you’ve had at least one awkward conversation about mental health, where why African parents ignore depression left you frustrated, confused, or just plain speechless.
Mental health in Nigeria has long been a taboo subject, especially among older generations. For many Nigerian parents, the idea of depression, anxiety, or therapy is foreign — even threatening. But times are changing, slowly but surely. So why the disconnect, and what’s actually shifting?
Let’s break it down.
Growing Up Nigerian: Toughen Up or Shut Up
Childhood Conditioning and Emotional Suppression
In most Nigerian households, emotional resilience is praised. You fall down? “Stand up, you’re not weak.” You cry? “Why are you crying like a baby?” Vulnerability wasn’t nurtured — it was shut down.
For our parents, mental toughness was survival. Expressing sadness or anxiety was a sign of weakness. That mindset became ingrained, passed down, and normalized.
What Mental Health Meant to Our Parents
“Madness” or Nothing
For many older Nigerians, mental illness meant just one thing — madness. You had to be roaming the streets, talking to yourself, or acting erratically to be considered mentally unwell. Anything short of that? You’re “fine.”
This black-and-white thinking left no room for issues like:
- Depression
- Anxiety
- PTSD
- Burnout
- Panic attacks
These terms were simply not part of the vocabulary.
Religion and Spiritual Explanations
“Go and Pray” Culture
Let’s be real: If you ever tried to talk about mental exhaustion, how often did the conversation quickly turn spiritual?
- “Go to church.”
- “Pray it away.”
- “You need deliverance.”
In many Nigerian homes, religion is the first — and sometimes only — response to emotional or psychological issues. Mental illness is seen as a lack of faith or even demonic possession.
Stigma and Shame
Saving Face and Keeping Secrets
Mental health problems are seen as a disgrace — not just for the individual but for the entire family. Nigerian parents worry that a diagnosis might:
- Ruin marriage prospects
- Bring shame to the family
- Make people “talk”
So they’d rather keep it quiet, or pretend it doesn’t exist. This culture of silence has silenced millions.
The “Hard Life” Mentality
“Do You Know What I Went Through?”
Our parents survived civil wars, military regimes, fuel scarcity, poverty — the list goes on. So when you talk about anxiety from too many Zoom calls, they’re like:
They see mental stress as a luxury problem. If they survived all that without “depression,” why can’t you?
Lack of Exposure and Education
No Language, No Awareness
Let’s be fair — many Nigerian parents simply don’t know better. They weren’t taught about emotional intelligence or mental wellness. There’s also a huge knowledge gap:
- Few schools taught it
- The media ignored it
- It was never discussed in public
So, how could they understand something they never even heard of growing up?
The Role of Social Media in Changing the Narrative
Gen Z and Millennials Are Talking Loud
Social media has become therapy, activism, and education rolled into one. Platforms like Twitter, TikTok, and Instagram have created safe spaces for Nigerians to:
- Share mental health struggles
- Promote therapy and self-care
- Deconstruct harmful stereotypes
This new wave is forcing the conversation into family dinners and WhatsApp groups.
The Rise of Nigerian Therapists and Coaches
Mental Health is Going Local
Another big shift? More Nigerian professionals are entering the mental health field. They understand our culture, language, and challenges — and they’re offering services that feel more relatable than foreign therapists ever could.
Popular mental health platforms now include:
- She Writes Woman
- Mentally Aware Nigeria Initiative (MANI)
- JoyHQ
- MyTherapist.ng
Education Is Catching Up
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Universities and NGOs Step In
Mental health awareness is gradually making its way into schools, especially at the university level. As conversations around why African parents ignore depression gain momentum, campaigns, clubs, and seminars now encourage students to talk openly and seek help.
Even some churches and mosques now hold wellness sessions — a huge step forward from the “pray it away” era.
The Role of Pop Culture and Celebrities
From Burna Boy to Beverly Naya
Nigerian celebrities have also begun opening up about mental health, which helps normalize it. When public figures share their struggles, it sends a strong message:
“It’s okay not to be okay.”
Music, movies, and podcasts are now reflecting the mental and emotional lives of everyday Nigerians.
Younger Parents, New Perspectives
The Cycle Is Breaking
Millennial and Gen Z parents are starting to raise kids differently. They’re reading parenting books, learning about emotional intelligence, and prioritizing mental health early.
This shift will have ripple effects across future generations.
Therapy Is Becoming Cool
No More Hiding
Once seen as something shameful, therapy is now worn like a badge of honor. People proudly say:
- “My therapist said…”
- “I’m in therapy and loving it.”
- “Mental health is wealth.”
The Nigerian Gen Z lifestyle now includes wellness as a status symbol — and that’s not a bad thing.
Challenges That Still Remain
Cost, Access, and Language Barriers
Let’s not get too carried away — therapy is still expensive for most Nigerians. And for people in rural areas, access is close to zero. Plus, the local language for talking about emotions is still underdeveloped.
So while awareness is growing, accessibility is still playing catch-up.
What Can You Do?
How to Talk to Your Nigerian Parents About Mental Health
If you want your parents to understand you better, try these tips:
- Start slow: Share your feelings bit by bit.
- Use relatable stories: “You know how you feel when…?”
- Don’t argue: Educate with love, not anger.
- Use examples from religion or culture that they understand.
- Be patient: Change takes time.
The Road Ahead
The journey to mental health acceptance in Nigeria is slow, but it’s moving. Our parents may never fully understand what depression means. But they’re starting to listen — and that’s huge.
With every honest conversation, every shared post, and every therapy session booked, the tide is turning. And who knows? The next generation may not have to unlearn what we had to.
Conclusion: A New Dawn Is Rising
Mental health is no longer just a “Western thing.” It’s real, it’s present, and it’s finally being acknowledged in Nigerian homes. Even though why African parents ignore depression still lingers, they’re beginning to accept it.
Change doesn’t happen overnight. But every brave Nigerian who speaks up about why African parents ignore depression is pushing us forward. And that’s how healing begins — one conversation at a time.
FAQs: Why Nigerian Parents Still Don’t Understand Mental Health
1. Why do Nigerian parents ignore mental health issues?
Because they were raised to value survival over emotions and see mental illness as spiritual or shameful.
2. How do I explain anxiety or depression to my Nigerian parents?
Use simple, relatable examples. Try to connect it to physical health or spiritual well-being they understand.
3. Are there Nigerian therapists I can talk to?
Yes! Check out platforms like MANI, She Writes Woman, JoyHQ, or MyTherapist.ng for Nigerian professionals.
4. Is therapy becoming accepted in Nigeria?
Yes, slowly. Gen Z and millennials are normalizing therapy and emotional wellness, especially on social media.
5. What if my parents never understand?
That’s okay. Focus on your healing, find a support system, and be the change for the next generation.
